Thursday, October 29, 2009

October 30, 2008


Disturbance on Mars? Someone Call the Cops

Well, here's some strange news: Astronomers are reporting what appear to be a series of explosions on the surface of Mars. Even the two Mars rovers sent back data on several "seismic events" before mysteriously going silent. NASA attributes the lack of communication to a software glitch, and engineers are working to resolve the issue.

Of greater concern is the loss of contact with the Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter, which had been mapping the surface of the red planet. Some experts are speculating that perhaps Mars was hit by several meteors, one of which may have also struck the Orbiter. The odds of such a collision, however, are believed to be a million to one. Still, if true, that would represent the loss of a valuable exploration tool.

---Lugosi, 12:01 A.M.

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WTF Was That?

A few minutes ago there was a loud crash that shook my windows and just about knocked me out of bed. I'm guessing that a truck crashed into something nearby.

If there's one thing I really hate more than the Bush administration, it's getting woken up in the middle of the night.... Especially when I'm having one of my dreams about Britney blowing in my ear.

---Lugosi, 4:28 A.M.

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I'm Starting to Get Irritated

Well, so much for going right back to sleep. Now all sorts of sirens keep going by. Normally that's not that unusual. I live near a major intersection, and you can occasionally hear emergency vehicles as they go up one road or another. What's different this time is that I've counted well over 20 sets of sirens go by. That's surprising, since I didn't think Warrenton had that many fire trucks, police cars, and ambulances.

I still don't know what that noise was, but it apparently wasn't that nearby. Assuming those sirens are responding to whatever happened, it must have been several miles away. The sirens keep fading off in the distance rather than stopping right away.

Anyway, it's still not too late for John McCain to win my vote. All he has to do is promise to let me get a decent night's sleep.

---Lugosi, 4:44 A.M.

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Finally, Some Peace and Quiet

Well, things have finally quieted down. There's still an occasional helicopter, but at least the sirens have stopped for the most part. That orange glow in the distance seems to be gone as well, so I guess that means they succeeded in knocking down the fire. Not surprising, since earlier it sounded like every fire truck in the state was heading in that direction.

Still, I've decided to take the day off. I don't want to leave, then find out this evening that I can't come home for three weeks. Do you have any idea how much two cats can poop in that amount of time?

No way I want to come home to a litter box that full.

---Lugosi, 6:36 A.M.

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Really, REALLY Irritated

Just when you think things have quieted down, a new set of sirens goes screaming by. And just in case that's not enough to wake the dead, several helicopters have been circling overhead. I've pretty much given up on trying to go back to sleep.

I went outside to see what was up and ran into several neighbors. According to them, there was a pipeline explosion a few miles away. Sure enough, you can even see an orange glow in the sky off to the north.

That would certainly seem to account for what's going on. I know that several of the big pipelines from the Gulf pass through Fauquier county, but I had thought they were down in the southern part of the county--the exact opposite direction from whatever the hell is happening.

Anyway, now it looks like the cops are blocking off Route 17 going north. If they tell us to start evacuating, I'm not going. I'll be like those people in New Orleans who refused to leave ahead of Katrina. And everything worked out well for them, didn't it?

If you're lucky, maybe you'll see me tomorrow on the roof my building waving at the news choppers.

---Lugosi, 5:39 A.M.

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Possible Plane Crash?

I recognized one of the deputies manning the road block near my house as someone I went to school with. What he had to say was nothing short of incredible.

It turns out that what happened last was NOT a pipeline explosion. Rather, something had crashed in the woods about five miles outside of town and set off a large fire. Most people seemed to think it was an airplane, but there were also rumors that it may have been some sort of satellite. Witnesses near the crash described a "large ball of fire" that had come straight down out of the sky and plowed into the ground. Whatever it was, the flames were still preventing the authorities from getting close to the impact site.

I went back and told the neighbors. One of them has a 4WD pick up, so a group of us are going to try and get close to the action by taking some back roads. If need be, we can cut through some fields. Some of you may think that's a little sick, but it's really no different from looking at a car crash along the highway. And don't even try to tell me you've never done that.

This may sound dorky, but I'm going to grab my laptop and let you know what I see.

---Lugosi, 8:09 A.M.

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Something Definitely Crashed Here

We've been able to get surprisingly close to the impact site. Despite having hundreds of people on the scene, there's no real crowd control. That road block back in town is apparently only for show.

The fires are mostly out. In fact, there are a number of what appear to be military personnel that are trying to get all the rescue equipment moved out of the area as fast as possible. Oh, and what I had thought was one helicopter periodically circling over Warrenton? Now it looks like it was actually several helicopters merely on their way up here. I count about 14 or 15 of them sitting on the ground in an open field near.... Near whatever. The choppers are all camouflage green, so I'm guessing either army or air force.

So why would the military be on the scene of a plane crash? Well, probably because that's clearly not what happened here. There's a large crater with an actual raised rim visible amid a bunch of charred trees. If I had to guess, I'd say this was a meteorite. Or maybe some sort of large satellite, which would account for the military presence. The inside of the crater is still obscured by either smoke or some sort of mist, so there's no telling what's in there.

---Lugosi, 10:17 A.M.

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Odd Rumors Circulating

Well, this is certainly interesting. I overheard a couple of the military guys talking, and apparently this isn't the only such impact site in the country. According to them, there have even been reports from overseas.

But that's not the alarming part. What's REALLY scary is the noises coming from inside the crater: It's almost like metal banging against metal, accompanied by some sort of mechanical sounds. If I didn't know better, it almost sounds like something being assembled. There's still some sort of heavy smoke or mist in the crater, so none of the helicopters has been able to get a look at what's going on.

A number of big black SUV's rolled up a while ago. Quite a few army type people got out and have clearly taken charge of the area. They've pushed everyone except the actual military personnel further back.

Looks like they're getting a small team together to climb the side of the crater and get a better look at what's making that noise. And they're not dicking around: Several of them are armed with some pretty big guns. Why do you need weapons to go look at a meteorite?

All of a sudden I'm thinking I should have stayed home.

---Lugosi, 11:50 A.M.

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The Military Moves in

Things are definitely getting scary now.

About half an hour ago six soldiers went up the outside of the crater. Evidently they still couldn't anything see because of the smoke, and so they actually climbed down inside. Suddenly there were screams followed by some shooting. There was also some sort of other sound, kind of like an electronic buzzing.

Only two of the guys back out of the crater, and they were obviously in a hurry. After a quick conference, several ran to a new helicopter that had showed up here just a little while ago. This one appears to be armed with missiles of some sort.

Meanwhile, I just checked Yahoo. I thought I saw a headline about some sort of military attack in France and clicked on the link, but it come back as "Page not found." So I went back to Yahoo and hit refresh, and the headline was now gone entirely. Then I tried going to news.google, but that site was down entirely. What the hell is going on? No wonder crazy rumors are circulating.

I'll let you know what happens after the helicopter takes off.

---Lugosi, 12:29 P.M.

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A Terrifying Turn of Events

I'm now hiding in a a small creek bed.

Earlier a military helicopter took off and launched several missiles into the crater. They never made it, instead exploding well outside of the rim. Moments later some sort of beam of intense light shot out of the crater and hit the chopper. It immediately exploded, and some of the falling debris hit several soldiers on the ground. The others began to scatter. Some ran towards the woods, others went for the SUV's. Looked like one group was going for one of the remaining helicopters.

Suddenly something emerged from the crater. Hard to say exactly what it was, except that it appeared to be some sort of mechanical giant that stood maybe 30 or 40 feet tall. It began firing the same bursts of energy (or light or whatever) that had brought down the first helicopter. Whenever the beam hit a person, he or she ended up bursting into flame. It pretty much had the same effect on the helicopters and the SUV's, reducing them to smoldering piles of twisted metal. Then it started going for the remaining firetrucks, destroying them as well. At this point there must have been hundreds of people running and screaming. Unfortunately for them, they were way out in an open field, with no cover nearby.

The group of spectators I was with were further away, so we had a little more time. I decided to head for the cover of some trees and a stream. My neighbors, unfortunately, made a break for their truck. Last I saw them was when that beam caught up with them.

The robot eventually trudged off towards the east, which also happens to be the direction towards DC. I started to come out of my hiding place when suddenly another of those machines whirred to life in the crater. Over the course of the next hour or so, six more of them emerged from the crater.

As near as I can tell, all of the giant robots are finally gone. After they made mincemeat out of everyone and everything within their range--which appears to be line of site regardless of the distance-- they went off in various directions. One actually passed within fifty yards of me. I thought for sure I was about to die, but it just kept going.

Since then I've been checking various news sites. For the most part they're all showing the same headlines about the Fed's latest rate cut, or presidential poll numbers, or the World Series. And that's what's curious: They're ALMOST always the exact same headlines. It's been that way since this morning.

I have found, however, a number of other sites claiming that the government has stepped in and taken over all official news outlets. Apparently it's part of an effort to prevent panic from sweeping the country. I've never been one for conspiracy theories, but based on what I saw earlier, it makes sense.

I'm going to try and make my way back home.

---Lugosi, 2:19 P.M.

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Home.... Or What's Left of It

Most of Warrenton is either still in flames or reduced to rubble. The machine that did this appears to be gone, and a few survivors are roaming the streets. Most appear to be in shock, incapable of taking in the devastation around them. A few others are just sitting in the wreckage of their lives, weeping uncontrollably. I passed by one guy who was talking to a small pile of ash that I'm guessing used to be his wife.

That police road block? The squad cars were just piles of wreckage. No sign of my friend the cop.

I finally made it to my apartment building, or at least what was left of it. My half of the structure was gone. I spotted one of my cats off in some bushes. When I called to him, he just took off running.

The lower two floors of the other half of the building were mostly intact. I forced my way into one unit and found that the electricity, though flickering, was still on. I turned on the TV but the cable was out. That's no surprise; Comcast goes out if you as much as sneeze.

Found another apartment on the second floor that had a small satellite dish mounted on the balcony railing. Everything seemed to still be hooked up, but all the channels came up either blank or with test patterns.

---Lugosi, 4:30 P.M.

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Finally, Some Transportation

I was having what seemed like an intelligent conversation with another survivor when he suddenly said that today's horrible events are proof of God's existence. According to him, all the death and destruction was a the lord's way of punishing us for allowing abortions, legalizing same-sex marriages, and giving Obama a double digit lead in the polls.

I tried to point out that wherever these creatures came from, they had arrived in space ships. And if they were from heaven and sent by God, then why did they need space ships?

Instead of answering my question, the man said that if I wanted to be saved, then all I needed to do was accept God. Then He would protect me from all harm. As proof, he cited himself. "I have accepted God, and in return he is protecting me from all harm." Then he closed his eyes to offer up a prayer of thanks.

That's when I hit him in the head with a baseball bat and stole his car.

---Lugosi, 6:24 P.M.

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Blackout

When I first, er, "commandeered" that car a few hours ago, I really had no idea where I was going to go. I just knew I had to get the hell out of Warrenton before more of those things came back. Now I think I made a mistake.

Since most of those machines headed east, I decided to go west. Seemed logical at the time.

So now I'm in Charlottesville, and I'm seeing plenty evidence that machines have been through here as well. Much of the city is destroyed and in flames. I spoke with one survivor who said that the things came out of the mountains with no warning. Unlike the "ship" that landed in Warrenton, this one had ended up in a much more remote area. I'm starting to realize that attack is much more widespread than I had thought, perhaps even effecting the whole world. If so, that would mean that no where is safe.

There still seems to be a news blackout in effect. Can't say if it's the aliens blocking the signals or our own government censoring things, but the effect is the same: No one knows what's going on. Even the official internet news sites are down.

I'm going to hit the road again. Just keep heading west, I guess.

---Lugosi, 8:14 P.M.

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An Update

Well, this is f*cking great.I just ran out of gas. I have no clue as to where I am, except that I'm somewhere south of Lynchburg and north of Roanoke. Still can't get any real news, but there are plenty of other sites on the internet with information.

From what I've been able to piece together, these craft began crashing into Earth early this morning. For the most part, they seemed to end up in remote areas where they could assemble their "walkers" unencumbered by human interference.

One notable exception was one that ended smack in the middle of the Seine River in Paris. The occupants of the ship drowned when they opened their craft. Divers quickly entered the vessel and discovered components for six of the 40 foot tall walkers, and as many as 20 alien beings. They are described as being about five feet tall, with six limbs. It is believed they are from Mars, where they apparently live underground.

One French astrobiologist theorized that these "Martians" were forced to move underground when the surface of their planet became uninhabitable. This may well have happened several thousand years ago, and they've spent the intervening centuries planning the invasion of Earth so they could rebuild their civilization.

The walkers were devised as weapons, as well as provide the occupants with needed transportation. Earth's higher gravity is apparently a serious problem for them.

Gotta go. I'm hearing voices from somewhere up ahead.

---Lugosi, 10:03 P.M.

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Some Survivors

As I was walking towards the voices, I began to sense that there was a large object in the road up ahead. At first I thought it was a tree, though it was hard to tell in the dark. I was just thinking it was good I ran out of gas when I did, or I would have plowed right into it.

My heart just about ended up in my throat when I realized it wasn't a tree, but one of those damned Martian walkers. It was lying on its side and appeared to be disabled. There were no noises coming from it at all. My first thought was that somehow the people surrounding it had brought the thing down.

Turns out that wasn't the case at all. In fact, they had been fleeing from it, and its death ray had picked off about 40 people from the original group when the machine suddenly froze up. After a few minutes it just toppled over. After a while the survivors cautiously approached it, and that was about the time I heard them.

We've found what appears to be a hatch of sorts. Now we're debating whether to try to open damn thing. The rest of these idiots can do what they want, but I'm going to hide in the treeline.

---Lugosi, 10:34 P.M.

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A Revelation

So.... Just as we're standing there arguing about who's going to be stupid enough to open this thing, the issue was settled for us. There was a sudden hissing sound, and before any of us could react, the hatch opened on its own and an alien body just kind of plopped out onto the ground.

As near as any of us could tell, the creature looked like it had bled to death. There appeared to be blood--assuming that's what it was--oozing from its eyes and nose. As to the body's overall appearance, well, its skin was blotchy and cracked. Without having a healthy live version to compare it to we couldn't say for sure, but this particular Martian looked sick as hell.

Someone shined a flashlight in through the open hatch. There appeared to be two more dead creatures inside.

---Lugosi, 10:55 P.M.

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More Survivors

Our group had decided to set up camp for the night near the wreckage of the Martian walker. Just as we began to settle down for the night, someone noticed lights in the distance. They were moving fast, and straight for us. There was some panic that it might be another Martian machine, but we soon realized it was a bus.

The new group turned out to be from Roanoke. Several machines had been leveling the city when they began shutting down one by one. That's when this particular group of humans decided to make a run for it on a bus they had found.

Someone had a shortwave radio but its rechargeable battery had died earlier in the day. Our group has plenty of flashlights, so we're going to try to jury rig some sort of connection from our batteries to the radio.

---Lugosi, 11:27 P.M.

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From Amid the Ashes, Hope

We got the radio going and quickly found a broadcast from France. Fortunately it turned out we had a French major from nearby Radford University in our midst, and he was able to translate.

The bottom line is that the initial Martian attack was absolutely devastating. Major cities all over the world had been wiped out, and as many as two billion people were feared dead. However, the threat now appeared to be over. Over the course of the last several hours, all the Martian machines seem to have shut down. In the cases where humans succeeded in opening them up, the occupants were found to be dead.

Then that French astrobiologist I had seen quoted earlier joined the broadcast. His theory was that the Martians, having come from an otherwise dead world, had forgotten about the threat posed by microbes. When exposed to the alien viruses and bacteria of Earth, their bodies quickly succumbed to the onslaught of germs.

Does that mean we were now safe? The astrobiologist was cautionary on that. He said it depended on what kind of capabilities the remaining occupants of Mars had left, and whether they would realize their mistake. But for now at least, yes, we were safe.

So where does mankind go from here? It's hard to say, except that we have a massive job ahead: Rebuilding civilization. That will clearly require a great deal of international cooperation. But what happens after that? Will the petty jealousies between nations once again conspire to pull us apart from one another? Or have we as a species learned once and for all that we must live together as one, or eventually die? Only time will tell.

On the bright side, there are unconfirmed reports out of Alaska that Sarah Palin was vaporized when she tried to field dress a Martian.

There is, however, one thing that is absolutely certain: The next time I get a cold, I'll be thankful as hell.

---Lugosi, 11:59 P.M.

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Epilogue


H.G. Welles' "War of the Worlds" has been done as a book, a radio broadcast, a movie (twice), and a music album. So why not a blog? And since yesterday was the 70th anniversary of the Orson Welles radio production of the story, it seemed like an opportune time to do it. As it turned out, I wasn't the only one who had the same idea.

My apologies if any of you ran screaming into the streets in your underwear.

---Lugosi